Being a single mother of two amazing little girls leaves little time for such personal matters as dating. I do however, try to make time for dates from time to time. Which normally turns out to be a MISTAKE! Why am I wasting 2 hours of my life to sit and chit chat with someone that is not even that interesting? All that happens on a first date is sitting and pretending to be interested in the other persons life, awkwardly laugh, and make sure I dont get too much food in my teeth. I don't really want to know everything about you on the first date. I most likely will forget what restaurant we were at and I will most definiately forget your birthday, astrological sign, and the names of your siblings. Some basic rules for dating for all the clueless guys out there:
1. Dont take me on a boring date! i.e.: dinner, movies (unless there is one I have been talking about incessantly) that is so overplayed. Try something new, whether its exciting and adventureous or romantic and intimate (word to the wise, don't make it to intimate, that will just make it even more uncomfortable.)
2. Dont ask me out then ask me to pay my half. (Even if I offer to pay half-DECLINE the generousity, its a TEST)
3. Dont get too personal. I will be open about most aspects of my life but there are things that I just don't want to talk to you about.
4. I Do Not need a chaperone, nor do you, your a big boy so don't make this into a meet and greet by 'meeting up' with your buddies.
5. I Do Not care if your cat just fell out of a tree, your friends moms cousins uncle has a cough, your fantasy football quarterback just tore a ligament, or any other lame excuse: STAY OFF YOUR CELL PHONE!! (including text) This is the time your supposed to show me attention and remember... YOU asked ME out.
6. You may have a very dry sense of humor which I personally tend to like, however, when it is taken to the extreme and you are always being sarcastic, your just annoying me and now I think your an ass. So Stop it.
7. This ties into #3. Don't tell me about your past relationships in detail to the point of tears, don't ask me about my favorite position in bed, don't call me love, baby, or honey, don't tell me you will take care of me forever and I won't ever have to do anything (back to the annoying thing,its not a turn on), and don't ask me to come home with you (now you just want to get laid and I am NOT okay with that)
8. For this one I needed an entire number: Don't talk to me about 'our' kids. If you have children, thats great, I have 2 so you understand some of the same scenarios I encounter on a daily basis. I do appreciate the fact you are acknowledging I am a mother, however, My children are just that MY CHILDREN. Your children are yours. I don't know what the future holds, I don't know if I will have more children, and it is really creepy if you even mention something about how beautiful 'our' children would be or how we would be such a cute 'family'. Hey Creeper: save that till your ready to get married.
*Everything here has happened to me personally. I am just trying to save some other poor woman from having to deal with the same thing. Good Luck Boys! xoxo